What Age Is Hardest for Kids to Move?

Ages 12 to 14 are the hardest for kids to move. Kids this age face a "double stress" of starting over while dealing with big body and brain changes. Research shows teens who move at 14 have twice the risk of serious problems later in life.

Moving affects different ages in different ways. Young kids bounce back fast. School-age children need more help but can adapt. But early teens? They struggle the most. This guide will help you understand why some ages are harder than others and what you can do to help your kids through any move.

Why Some Ages Handle Moving Better Than Others

Kids' brains work differently at each age. This affects how they handle big changes like moving.

Brain Development Makes a Difference

A child's brain is still growing until their mid-20s. The parts that help with emotions grow faster than the parts that help with thinking clearly. According to the National Institute of Mental Health, the onset of puberty between ages 10 and 12 brings changes in the brain that increase sensitivity to rewards, threats, and peers. This makes teens extra sensitive to stress and change.

Young kids live in the moment. They don't fully understand what moving means. As long as mom and dad are there, they feel okay. But older kids have formed stronger friendships and routines. Breaking these connections feels much harder.

The Role of Social Connections

Friends become more important as kids get older. Toddlers mainly care about family. But by middle school, friends help shape who kids think they are. Moving means leaving these important relationships behind.

Research from Denmark studied 1.5 million children and found clear patterns. Kids who moved during their early teen years had more problems with mental health, relationships, and school success later in life. The comprehensive study published in the American Journal of Preventive Medicine followed people from age 15 into their 40s.

The Hardest Ages: Early Adolescence (12-14 Years)

Early adolescence is hands down the worst time to move a child. Here's why this age group struggles so much.

Why Ages 12-14 Are So Difficult

Kids this age face what experts call a "perfect storm" of challenges:

• Body changes: Puberty brings hormone changes that affect mood and emotions
• Brain development: The emotional parts of their brain are very active, but the thinking parts are still developing
• Identity formation: They're figuring out who they are, often through their friend groups
• Social pressure: Fitting in feels life-or-death important

Moving at age 14 doubles a child's risk of suicide by middle age and more than doubles their risks of violent crime and drug abuse, according to research published in the American Journal of Preventive Medicine.

The Science Behind the Struggle

Relocated adolescents often face a "double stress of adapting to an alien environment, a new school, and building new friendships and social networks, while simultaneously coping with the fundamental biological and developmental transitions that their peers also experience", researchers explain.

The timing couldn't be worse. Just when teens need stability most, a move takes away everything familiar. New school, new kids, new teachers, new neighborhood – it's overwhelming.

Signs Your Teen Is Struggling

Watch for these warning signs after a move:

• Sudden mood changes or increased anger
• Problems sleeping or eating
• Grades dropping at the new school
• Not wanting to try new activities or make friends
• Talking about how much they hate the new place
• Withdrawing from family activities

Ages That Handle Moving Best

Not all ages struggle equally with moving. Some kids bounce back faster than others.

Babies and Toddlers (0-3 Years)

This is the easiest age to move. Very young children:

• Don't understand what's happening
• Care most about staying close to their parents
• Haven't formed strong outside friendships yet
• Adapt quickly to new surroundings

As long as their main caregivers stay calm and loving, babies and toddlers handle moves well. Their world is small and centered on family.

Preschoolers (3-5 Years)

Preschoolers can be a bit trickier than babies, but they still adapt fairly well:

• Good news: They're flexible and make friends easily
• Challenge: They notice changes and may ask lots of questions
• Tip: Use simple words to explain what's happening

Many families like to move before kids start kindergarten. This way, children begin school with other kids in the same situation. The U.S. Census Bureau reports that families with children under 6 have the highest moving rates at 20.5%, reflecting this common strategy.

Elementary Age (6-11 Years)

School-age kids fall in the middle. They're harder to move than little ones but easier than teens:

• Advantages: They can help with the move and understand explanations
• Challenges: They've made school friends and have routines
• Key concern: Starting at a new school mid-year can be tough

Kids this age look up to their parents. If you stay positive about the move, they're more likely to feel good about it too.

The Moderately Difficult Ages

Some ages aren't the worst, but they're not the easiest either.

Late Elementary/Middle School (9-12 Years)

This is when moving starts getting harder:

• Friend groups become more important
• Kids have developed stronger school connections
• They're more aware of what they're leaving behind
• By 5th grade, girls become very "clicky" and don't welcome new friends easily

High School Teens (15-18 Years)

Older teens face different challenges than younger ones:

• Why it's hard: They've spent years building their social circles
• Silver lining: They have better coping skills than younger teens
• Reality check: Moving during high school can still be devastating

The good news? Older teens can better understand the reasons for moving. They can also maintain long-distance friendships more easily.

What Makes Moving Harder for Any Age

Certain factors make moves more difficult regardless of a child's age.

Family Stress Levels

Parents often set the tone for how their children will cope, experts note. If parents are stressed, anxious, or upset about the move, kids pick up on these feelings.

According to the World Health Organization, about 14% of adolescents aged 10-19 experience mental health conditions, which remain largely unrecognized and untreated. When families are dealing with other problems like divorce, job loss, or illness, moving becomes even harder. The stress adds up.

Multiple Moves

One move is tough enough. But kids who move frequently struggle more with:

• Forming lasting friendships
• Feeling secure and stable
• Trusting that good things will last
• Academic progress due to different school systems

Reason for the Move

Why you're moving matters too:

• Positive moves (new job, bigger house) are easier than crisis moves
• Planned moves work better than sudden ones
• Family choice feels different than being forced to move

Distance and Cultural Changes

Moving across town is different from moving across the country. Bigger changes bring bigger challenges:

• Different accents or languages
• New climate or geography
• Different school systems
• Cultural differences in the new area

How to Make Moving Easier for Your Kids

No matter what age your children are, you can help make the move smoother.

Before the Move

Start preparing your kids as soon as you know you're moving:

Talk Early and Often

• Once parents know a move is going to happen, the best thing parents can do is let the kids know the family is moving and when it is happening

• Give them time to process the news
• Answer their questions honestly
• Keep conversations age-appropriate

Get Them Involved

• Let older kids help pack their own rooms
• Allow them to choose paint colors for their new bedroom
• Include them in house-hunting (when possible)
• Give them small jobs so they feel helpful

Research Together

• Look up the new neighborhood online
• Find parks, libraries, and fun activities nearby
• Learn about their new school
• Show them pictures of their new home

During the Move

Moving day is stressful for everyone. Here's how to help:

Keep Routines When Possible

• Stick to normal meal and bedtimes
• Pack their favorite comfort items last
• Unpack their bedroom first in the new house

Stay Positive

• Keep your own stress in check
• Focus on the exciting parts of the move
• Let them know it's okay to feel sad or scared

Be Patient

• Expect some behavior changes
• Don't rush them to "get over it"
• Give extra hugs and attention

After the Move

The real work starts once you're in your new home:

Establish New Routines Quickly

• Set up bedtime and meal routines right away
• Find local activities your child enjoys
• Try to establish a routine for your kids as soon as you get to the new location

Help Them Connect

• Sign up for activities that match their interests
• Arrange playdates with potential new friends
• Join community groups or sports teams
• Don't pressure them to make friends immediately

Stay Connected to the Past

• Help them keep in touch with old friends
• Use video calls to stay connected with grandparents
• Create a photo album of memories from your old home
• Let them talk about what they miss

Special Considerations by Age Group

Different ages need different types of support during a move.

Helping Babies and Toddlers

• Keep their schedule as normal as possible
• Bring familiar toys and blankets
• Don't change too many things at once (like switching from a crib to a bed)
• Be extra patient with sleep problems or tantrums

Supporting Preschoolers

• Read books about moving together
• Use simple words to explain what's happening
• Let them pack a special box of their favorite things
• Tour the new house and neighborhood when possible

Assisting School-Age Kids

• Visit the new school before they start
• Help them join activities they enjoyed before
• Encourage them to invite classmates over for playdates
• Keep in touch with teachers about how they're adjusting

Helping Middle School Kids

• Give them extra time and patience
• Don't expect immediate adjustment
• Help them find activities where they can make friends
• Consider professional help if they're really struggling

Supporting High School Teens

• Involve them more in family decisions about the move
• Help them maintain old friendships through technology
• Look for clubs or activities that match their interests
• Be understanding if they want to finish high school at their old school (when possible)

When to Seek Professional Help

Sometimes kids need more support than parents can provide alone.

Warning Signs

Contact a counselor or therapist if your child shows:

• Depression that lasts more than a few weeks
• Anxiety that interferes with daily activities
• Aggressive behavior or constant anger
• Problems at school that don't improve
• Difficulty making any friends after several months
• Talk about hurting themselves

Types of Professional Support

Several types of professionals can help:

• School counselors can help with academic and social adjustment
• Child therapists specialize in helping kids process big changes
• Family counselors can help the whole family adjust together

Don't wait too long to seek help. Early support often prevents bigger problems later.

The Long-Term View: Building Resilience

While moving is challenging, it can also help kids develop important life skills.

Positive Outcomes of Moving

Kids who successfully navigate moves often develop:

• Better problem-solving abilities
• More flexibility and adaptability
• Stronger family relationships
• Greater independence and confidence
• Appreciation for different places and people

Teaching Coping Skills

Use the move as a chance to teach your kids how to:

• Handle big emotions in healthy ways
• Ask for help when they need it
• Stay connected to people they care about
• Find positives in difficult situations
• Build new relationships

Planning Your Move Timeline

If you have control over when you move, timing can make a difference.

Best Times to Move

Consider these timing options:

Summer: Kids have time to adjust before starting school End of school year: Natural transition point Beginning of school year: Start fresh with everyone else Avoid mid-school year:

 Unless absolutely necessary

When You Can't Control Timing

Sometimes life doesn't give you choices about when to move. If you must move at a difficult time:

• Give kids extra support and understanding
• Work closely with teachers at both old and new schools
• Consider getting professional help sooner rather than later
• Focus on what you can control

Moving With Local Movers: Making the Physical Move Easier

While this guide focuses on the emotional side of moving with kids, don't forget that the actual moving day matters too. Professional movers can help reduce the chaos and stress of moving day, which benefits the whole family.

A well-organized move means:

• Less disruption to your kids' routines
• More time for you to focus on supporting your children
• Reduced stress for parents (which helps kids feel calmer too)

Final Thoughts

Moving is one of life's biggest stressors, especially for children. While ages 12-14 are clearly the hardest for kids to handle a move, every age brings its own challenges and opportunities.

The key is understanding what your child needs based on their age and personality. Young kids need consistency and comfort. School-age children need involvement and clear explanations. Teens need patience, understanding, and time to grieve what they've lost.

Remember that adjustment takes time – often 6 months to a year or more. Some kids bounce back quickly, while others need longer to feel at home. Both reactions are normal.

Most importantly, your support makes all the difference. Kids who feel loved, heard, and supported through a move develop resilience that serves them well throughout life. While you can't eliminate all the challenges of moving, you can help your children navigate them successfully.

Whether you're planning a move or already in the middle of one, focus on connection, patience, and hope. With time and support, your family won't just survive the move – you'll come out stronger on the other side.

If you're planning a move in the Edmonton area and want to make the physical process as smooth as possible for your family, consider reaching out to professional movers who understand the importance of keeping families' stress levels low during this challenging time.